


Down & Dirty

by ChesterAnn



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Dirty Talk, Dorks in Love, Established Relationship, F Bombs, F/M, Implied sexy times, Reader Insert, Rooster Teeth - Freeform, Swearing, achievement hunter - Freeform, cursing, fluffy feels, inappropriate touching?, ray hates the outside, sexy touching, you make him love it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-25
Updated: 2015-07-02
Packaged: 2018-03-25 15:50:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3816160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChesterAnn/pseuds/ChesterAnn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You somehow convince Ray to come with you on a long weekend visit to your grandparents house. (But they're cool, not lame or boring..) You make Ray go outside, he thinks he's dying.. He ends up loving it and having a great time... I suck at summaries, I'm sorry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This literally came to me as I was having a visit at my grandparents house.. Living inspiration! I was bored and wanted someone cool to hang out with.. Then I pictured Ray tagging along and having to do all the shit I did that day, it made me laugh my ass off. So yeah.. Enjoy!

"I can't believe you talked me into going with you.. To the middle of the country... All that fresh air is going to kill me," Ray pouted looking over at you while you drove down the winding gravel road.

You rolled your eyes, "It'll be fun! My grandparents are excited to get to know you more... You'll only be teased the tiniest bit and if they go too far, I'll put a stop to it. Not that I think they will. My Gran polices my Grandpa about his behavior pretty good.." You wink at him and laugh. "Oh..but... You should know. We will be working in the garden. At least once or twice... Depending on the weather.. But that's it! And it's not even for a long time! Promise!" You spoke fast, smiling reassuringly at him.

"I fucking knew it... Where are the cameras? Bring out Ashton.. I'm getting punk'd aren't I?" He turned his body in his seat to face you, using a dramatic voice he stage whispered, "..and I thought you loved me..." Glancing over at him, he had pulled out the puppy dog eyes.. Wow.

"Hey! I do love you! And I want my family to love you too!"

Ray raised an eyebrow at that. "Not..in the same way I love you...goober.."

"Well, you've got me hostage for four days... Do with me what you will," he places his hands behind his head and winks with his cute smirk, "Hey, do we get to sleep in the same room...or.."

"That. I do not. Know...," you answered honestly, pulling into the gravel drive. You took a deep breath, suddenly very nervous for some reason. You felt Ray take your hand in his and you looked at him.

"It's gonna be fine," he spoke softly while tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. You nodded and braced for impact.

 

\--------------

 

"Ughh.. You didn't tell me I'd be up at the ass crack of dawn....," Ray whined, still halfway under the covers, pillow over his head.

"It's barely past nine," you were in the bathroom brushing your teeth. You came into the office/guest room (it only became an extra guest room when they blew up the air mattress) and pulled the pillow off of his head, pointing your toothbrush at him, "Just be glad that I woke up before Grannie came to wake either of us up.. Or we'd be getting a lecture right now."

He chuckled and stretched, "Yeah, we would..", his grin was sleepy, but mischievous.

They had put you into separate rooms. You in the guest bedroom and Ray in the office, fortunately it had an adjoining bathroom. Unfortunately for your trusting grandparents, you had snuck into the office about an hour after they had gone to bed and snuggled up with Ray until you both fell asleep. Around 8:30 nature had called, soon after your Grannie had opened up your door to wake you up, but didn't find you in your bed and then called out your name. You were able to pop out of the bathroom looking as innocent as can be, grinning like an angel. She greeted you and told you to wake up Ray, eat breakfast, get dressed and ready to work in the garden. 

Ray wandered into the bathroom, walking behind you as you tied up your hair in a high ponytail. He wrapped an arm around your waist and kissed your shoulder. Turning around, he went into the smaller separate room with the shower and toilet to relieve himself. "I'm gonna jump in the shower real quick," he called through the door.

"I'd wait on that.. Working. Outside. In the dirt." 

"Yeah, good point..," he came out scratching his messy bed head, "So what do I need to wear?" He crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame, looking into your room.

"Uhmm... It's gonna be hot and humid," you were changing clothes while you spoke, "So, I'd say.. Shorts, T-shirt, maybe a hat and shoes you don't mind getting dirty.." 

Ray slid his glasses on his face and cocked his head to the side, watching as you bounced and wiggled into your cutoff jean shorts, "You need some help over there?" He nodded his chin in your direction. He seemed to be enjoying the view.

"Haha.. Yeah, okay.. We both know," You turned to face him, "If I asked you to help with my jeans, they'd be across the room before I could blink...and..," You were looking down while you zipped up your fly, when he began silently approaching in your direction. You could see his feet, he was so close his toes were touching yours.

His hands gently moved yours away and fiddled idly with the button on your jeans, "and...." His voice was low and husky, it made a delicious chill run up your spine.

You looked up at him then, he was gazing at you from underneath his long eyelashes, biting at the corner his bottom lip. His finger had dipped into the top of your pants, just at the waistline, while his thumbs took turns circling the metal button on the front. Your breath stuttered when he unsnapped it. Both of your glasses were fogging up. A knock on the door, followed by your Grandpa's voice asking if you were ready to work, pulled you both out of your little haze. Making you jump about four feet from each other. 

You swallowed hard and gave Ray a knowing look, "Yeah! Be right out!"

 

\----

 

You had both been given your duties in the garden. Ray was digging two 6 inch deep trenches for the potatoes and you were scooping out holes every four inches or so along the back wall for the green beans. 

"Nice hoe...," you commented at Ray.

You were bent over working. He smiled, "Nice ass.."

"Cheeky bastard," you said more to yourself than to anyone else.

"Oh! Believe me, I'm not the cheeky one here!", he commented with that damn smirk plastered on his face. You threw a clump of dirt and hit him in the knee, leaving a small patch of mud behind.

"[Y/N] NO!", he yelled out.

"I was just helping you with your namesake.. Brownman!", you yelled back playfully. 

"HEY! Stop throwing shit and concentrate on what you're doing..," your Grandpa shouted from above. He was shaking his head laughing as he stood on the covered back porch/deck watching our progress.

"Leave 'em alone! They're just flirtin'!!," your Gran called back to him. She was working with y'all, placing the bean sprouts in the holes you'd been making.

You and Ray both turned a shade of red at her comment and got back to work.

 

\------

 

"I'm going to grab a water!" You informed whoever wanted to listen.

"That's fine, just take your shoes off before you go inside!" your Grannie requested. She was finishing up covering the newly transplanted sprouts.

"Hey," Ray was following you up the stairs to the back porch, "Grab. Me. One. Too." He got out between deep breaths.  

You came back outside with two cold bottles of water to see Ray looking like he'd collapsed in one of the patio chairs. "You alive?" you asked giggling at him. He had removed his glasses and had his head rested on the back of the chair. 

"No..", he responded quietly. You kissed his forehead and placed his water on his lap. Sitting in the chair next to him, propping up your feet, you groaned at your sore leg and arm muscles. Looking over, Ray had downed half his bottle already.

"So.. What? No Puerto Rican free yard work, jokes?" You asked him grinning, then taking a swig from your own bottle. 

"Exactly. No jokes. Just water," he finished the rest of his bottle and put it on the table between the two of you.

Your Grannie came up then, "Y'all are workin' hard! It's good for ya! Hopefully something actually grows this year.."

Ray gave you a look then, all you could do was shrug.

"Well, y'all have a little rest and then in a bit we'll put these other sprouts in their new pots. Give 'em a little more room to spread those roots. But that's easy work," she winked at us and patted Ray on the shoulder as she walked past him to go inside.

His head lolled lazily to the left to look at you, "Define 'easy work'?"

"We'll be sitting on our asses the whole time"

"I can do that.."

 

\-------

 

About 15 minutes later you three were all on the lower deck. You'd moved all the baby plants and the empty pots down there earlier. Now it was time for the 'easy work'..

"Why do you get ladybug gloves?" Ray asked you in a mock-jealous voice.

"Because my Grandpa got 'em for me! What..Do you want to use them, Ray?" you looked at him from over your glasses.

"Nah, I think I'll keep the ugly brown ones...," he said sarcastically, "Fuck yeah! Gimmie!"

You rolled your eyes as you took yours off and gave them to him, "Happy now?"

"Oh yeah!", he wiggled his lady bug covered fingers at you.

"Okay, kids.. We need to put fresh soil in all these pots.."

"Jusblze..", he said under his breath on instinct.

You rolled your eyes and nudged Ray with your elbow and he just looked at you, shrugging like 'what? I couldn't help it!' while wearing a big goofy grin.

 

\--------

 

"There so f'in tiny!" Ray was having troubling pulling apart the seedlings and transplanting them into their new pots. Everyone's gloves had been long forgotten. They made handling the plants too difficult, but it seemed even bare handed you both were having trouble.

"Yeah.. I'm scared that I'm either putting them too close together.. Or too many in one pot..." You felt his pain.

"Hey," your Gran said gently, "this is just an experiment.. To see what's gonna grow and what isn't.. Don't stress so much."

"Yeah, but.." You and Ray both started. 

"They're 45¢ seed packets.. You're not gonna break my wallet if they don't grow, okay? I promise, you're both doing great!" Your Grannie was awesome, you could have been putting them in upside down and she still would be as encouraging as ever.

"Question.." Ray started to say.

"Answer," You cut him off before he could finish.

"Why isn't your Grandpa helping us?"

"He let's us do the work to, and I quote, 'keep us out of trouble'.." You tell him.

"Ha! Does it work?"

You and your Gran answered at the same time, "No.."

"We just go into town and get into trouble there...", your Gran winked at him and gave you a knowing smile.

"Yup!" You just chuckled, "We'll show you tomorrow.."

Ray finally found his rhythm: de-potting the sprouts in his hand, fingering through the soft dirt, separating each small plant and then replanting them in their new, bigger pot. No one was really talking, just working and listening to the wind blow or the birds chatter. 

"Relaxing isn't it?" Your Gran asked after a while. 

"Yeah It actually is..." Ray was the first one to answer her, never stopping his meticulous work. You nudged his arm and he turned to look at you, a questioning look on his face. He seemed to be put off that you'd stopped him during his work. You nodded your head for him to move closer, so he leaned in toward you a bit more. You found his lips with your own. It was just a short, sweet kiss. You were both smiling when you pulled back.

"Thanks for bringing me" The sincerity in his voice and the genuine smile on his face made your heart melt.

"Thanks for coming" You said quietly.

He booped your nose with his finger, accidentally leaving a dark smudge there. He bubbled with laughter, "Oops.. Sorry..." He tried to rub it off with his thumb, but it only made it worse. He laughed louder, "I'm just gonna stop trying to help now"

You called his name and when he looked, you took two fingers from each hand and rubbed them across his face. Right under his glasses, like a football player. "Now we're even," you teased, winking at him.

 

\---------

 

"Hey, [Y/N].. Go grab the watering can and give everything a generous sprinkle. Would ya?" Your Gran called out to you. She and your Grandpa were setting up stakes and tying string so eventually some of the other plants had something to grow up.

"Yes, Ma'am!" You and Ray had been sitting on the edge of the garden on a railroad tie. You dusted off as you got up. Ray followed suit, maybe to help.. or maybe so they didn't ask him to tie any string. 

Since the water spout was about chest level, you positioned the water can between you and the wall with your knee bracing the bottom. It was nearly full when you accidentally shifted your weight trying to turn it off and felt some of the water hit your shorts and legs. "Shit..", you swore under your breath.

"What's up?", Ray asked curiously from his position behind you, leaning against the rail on the lower deck. Turning around you stop in your tracks.

 

Ray had taken off his shirt.

 

You swallowed hard, looking him up and down a few times. The dark hair of his happy trail made you bite your bottom lip. Seeing the dark spots on your shorts and water running down your legs from the spilled water Ray suppresses a chuckle, "If I was making you wet, you should have just told me.." He then takes off his glasses to clean them with his discarded shirt, looking up at you as he does so. Fuck. You nearly dropped the watering can.

"Put your shirt back on before I'm forced to do dirty things to you in front of my grandparents...", your voice was low and had a surprisingly husky tone.

He laughed placing his glasses back on his face, "Yeah, Okay..." His voice full of doubt and humor. If he only knew the thoughts going through your head right now. 

You stood next to him, placing the watering can on the wood railing. Turning to look up at his face covered in sweat and smears of dirt, you just shook your head grinning at the images flashing through your mind. Looking back out toward the garden you finally speak, but only loud enough for Ray to hear.

"You obviously don't know how much of an effect you have on me, Because if I were so inclined, you'd be on your back right now, I'd be straddling you, and you'd be screaming my name." Ray's jaw went a little slack as he stared at you, taking in everything you'd just said and then swallowing hard.

"[Y/N], you got the water? After you do that, we're finished for the day.." Your Gran called out to you from the top deck, having finished with all the tedious string tying. You hadn't even noticed them walk past you and up the stairs.

"Yes, ma'am," you leaned up and gave Ray a kiss on the cheek before leaving him to finish your last bit of work. You might have swished your hips a bit more knowing he was watching you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will definitely be a multi chapter fic, not sure how many atm though. That kinda depends on how y'all like it and for my muses to speak to me.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You show Ray how to you like to get into trouble, things don't necessarily go as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMSOSORRY this took so long to get up. I have no really good excuse, so this chapter is long and funny and awkward. All the things you need in a fluffy read fic! Haha Enjoy!
> 
> [lots of swearing! just fyi]

It was a 30 to 45 minute drive to the nearest town with actual stores and restaurants to visit. The tiny area your grandparents lived in had just the essentials: bank, hair salon, grocery store, gas station and post office. It was near a popular boating area, so there were some touristy stores and places to eat, but they were usually very over-priced.

"So today we show you how we get into trouble!", you informed Ray with a big grin in your face. 

"And if you're good and promise not to tell on us, I might treat you to lunch," your Grannie said with a wink, looking at him in the rear view mirror. 

"What have I gotten myself into?", Ray asked with a chuckle.

"Believe me, you'll have more fun ding-batting with us then you would 'watching golf' with my Grandpa while he actually just passes out in his recliner", you reassured him. 

"Uh, 'Ding-Batting'.. Could you please define that? Or use it in a sentence? My New Yorker ears have heard a LOT of southern slang, but 'ding-batting' takes the cake," he said smiling at you. That is until you looked at him over your glasses. "The metaphorical cake, that is," he tagged on.

Now your Gran gave you a look, "I'll explain later", you told her, "And Ding-Batting is what we do," focusing back on Ray and his question. "It's what Grandpa started calling it when all the aunts and sisters did when they got together to go shopping or go antiquing or to thrift stores.. We just ding-bat the day away." The grin on your face was so genuine, it caused Ray to join you.

"Well, then.. I can't wait for y'all to teach me," He leaned up to the front seat and gave you a quick kiss. 

"Aww.. He said 'y'all'!" Your Gran was smitten with this boy and it had only been two days.

\-----------

 

Your Gran gave you free reign over the music in the jeep. Flipping through your multitude of burned CDs you finally found one that seemed good. Pushing the buttons to make the stereo accept your CD offering, you turned around to look at Ray, "Don't hate me..."

"Uhh... That could never happen," he said not understanding what was going on. Turning back around to adjust the volume, as well as the bass because your Gran kept it really low. The car suddenly flooded with twangy 90s country music and you began bopping along in your seat. You chance another look back at Ray, it didn't disappoint. 

He had his 'grumpy cat' face on and was shaking his head from side to side, "I was wrong. I hate y--". Before he could finish your Gran cranked up the volume during the chorus. You burst into uncontrollable laughter and then tried to sarcastically ask Ray what he was trying to say. He yelled back a never mind and tried to hide the smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. 

\-----

The first stop was at a tiny, almost broken down looking building. It had junk all over the "parking" area and by the door. Your Gran and you eyed the place, shrugged and began looking at the piles of random shit scattered around outside before going in. Ray on the other hand..

"Sooo.. Is this where you kill me..or...", he hadn't moved 5 inches from the car. He stared at the shop like it was a looming haunted mansion waiting to eat him up. He visibly swallowed and you rolled your eyes. 

And because you couldn't resist you turned around and nonchalantly asked him, "You'd had all your shots right? Hepatitis, Tetanus, Rabies..?" Ray looked at you, wide eyed and mouth open, hands gesturing in an odd fashion in front of himself. You made sure you Gran had already headed inside and strolled over to him, "I'm fucking with you." Linking your arm in his, you began to walk him toward the front door, "The only thing you might get cooties from are knick-knacks...patty-wacks..moth balls....and asbestos." 

"Fuck. You," Ray said to you in his most 'I ain't having none of this shit today' voice. You giggled, kissed his cheek and pushed him through the door.  
\---- 

You might have been wrong before in having no worries. At the rate and volume the lady running the store was speaking at to another patron you might all go deaf and dumb from the conversation being had. The storefront encircled her front desk and no one was ever more than 10-15 feet from the loud ass bitch. Even the glass cases between you and her didn't muffle the pitch and frequency of this woman's shrill voice. 

You saw your Gran eyeing a door and pulled at the handle, it was heavy, but she heaved it open. She motioned for you to join her and you pulled on Ray's sleeve, dragging him behind you.

"The fuck are we going?"  
"Narnia. Hogwarts. Does it matter if it's away from this shit?"

\-----

Crossing the threshold into a new room of the shop, the thick wood door slammed shut practically hitting Ray. He jumped and ran into an old armoire, quickly turning around to steady it and apologize to the ancient piece of furniture. 

"You hear that?" Your Gran said with a mischievous smile on her face. Both of you began listening really hard, Ray even cupped his ears, but neither of you heard anything in particular. 

"OHMYGOD!" You might have gotten a bit loud once you figure out her little riddle. Ray was still clueless.

"I don't..uhh.... I'll take didn't get the joke for 200, Alex."

You pointed at the door. He looked between it and you a few times before he gave out a, "HOLY SHIIIT!" 

"Exactly.." You clapped for him and kissed his stupid face for finally understanding.

"That bitch is fucking loud..." He pretended to clean out his ears with his pinky. Then realized what he'd said and locked eyes with your Gran. He began to apologize, but she stopped him holding her hand up.

"No. She's fucking loud. You got it right." And with that she turned around and started perusing through all the things crammed into this huge, and thankfully quiet, room full of stuff. 

Dressers, chests, old bed frames, desks and rocking chairs. Most of the items were made of very nice polished wood or thing that would generally hold things within. In fact, some of them actually already did. You found blankets, tea sets, china and aprons. You were actually surprised that you didn't find a trunk labeled 'left socks' on it from the amount of random shit and lack of organization. 

Ray snuck up behind you, wraps his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder, "Your Grannie is so cool. It's not fair. How is she so cool? I mean, I said 'fuck' in front of her and she didn't bat an eyelash..." 

You smiled broadly and kept walking, Ray was still tethered to your waist and continued awkwardly walking along with you. "She's super cool because she has 3 sons and a Yankee husband. She doesn't take any shit and she calls you on your bullshit." You shrug, "She's also really enjoys playing Cards Against Humanity... She wins a lot too. That's not fair." You chuckled to yourself and then realized you had stopped moving. Or rather your legs were moving, but you weren't getting anywhere. 

Ray had stopped walking, but kept holding onto you. You turned around to look at him, his face was a riot. His head was cocked to the side, face was confused and you could tell he was trying to process the last bit of information you had just told him. 

"What..?"  
"Could you run that last part by me again?"  
"The Cards part?"  
"Uh-huh!"  
"She plays and wins at Cards Against Humanity. A lot."  
"The actual fuck, [Y/N]..?"  
"Whaaaat?"  
"How in Gods name did you convince her to play!?"  
"I explained the game and she said 'okay, let's play'..."  
"How did you even get through one round without literally dying from all the shit you had to say in front of her!!?"

You very calmly turned around and looked at him. You placed your hands in his face, "Oh my sweet, summer child.. That night I had to say the words 'PacMan uncontrollably guzzling cum' in front of her and I had no problem looking her in the eye the next morning. Is my family fucked up or awesome? I'll give you a few more days to decide." You fixed his hair for no reason, kissed his cheek and walked off to ask if y'all could move onto the next shop. This one didn't seem to be hiding any rare gems or special treasures. 

Ray was winding his way through to get to you both when he heard you telling your Gran that y'all should play CAH sometime that weekend, she immediately agreed and slung her arm around your middle. You caught Ray's hand, he'd frozen in disbelief at what you'd just done, what you had inevitably done to him and walked out together.

\-----

Waving a friendly hand at the lady, you greeted your departure and she telling you to come back soon. Your Gran muttered something along the lines of 'yeah, right..that's never gonna happen.' 

"Well kiddos, that place stole about 45 minutes of our lives that we'll never get back.. So. Next shop or early lunch?"

"Ray can pick, since he's the guest.."

He found his way out of his stupor, "Uuhhh.." 

"Lunch it is!" She reached back and patted his knee sympathetically, "I think we've worn him out too early, Goose." 

"Nah, he's fine. OH! Can we go to that little burger place? The one with the lunch counter and the amazing chocolate chip cookies?" You clapped your hands like a little kid. 

"You read my mind." She winked and turned onto the main road, heading toward the best burgers in town. Your mouth was watering just thinking about them, it had been far too long since you'd been there. 

"Did someone say food?", Ray finally perked up from the backseat.

"There he is! That's the man I love..." You beamed, looking at him in your visor mirror. 

He scooted forward in his seat, gently grabbed your shoulder causing you to look back at him, "You love me?" His voice was quiet and he had that stupid, adorable grin on his scruffy face.

"Uhh...." Now it was your turn to not remember how to talk. You nervously laughed, "Nooo... Not me. Nope. What? You're crazy.."

He squeezed your shoulder, deciding not to press on the subject and sat back. The smug look on his face killed you. It also made you smile uncontrollably, putting your face in your hands and leaning forward onto your legs. You groaned, "oh my god..."

Your Gran laughed, "Well this is going to be an interesting lunch." 

This was definitely going to be an interesting lunch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not as proud of this chapter as the last. *shrug* Let me know what y'all think! If you think Ray is too OOC, let me know that too. Hopefully a new chapter will be up a lot sooner than this one was. 
> 
> Thank you for all the love! I'm going to be putting up my Ray/Reader one shots I've done/been working on this weekend, so keep an eye out. (0_~)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long to get up.. I'm gonna try to get them up faster. My summer is super busy, so I'm writing when I can. ^_^ I hope y'all enjoy it

Arriving at the little diner, if you could really even call it that -- it was a restaurant in a tiny trailer, obviously Ray had not seen everything. 

"This is where we're going for lunch?" He did a few turns and scratched his head, "Is the place behind the shit shack or..." He threw his arm around your shoulder, squinting at the place.

You smacked him on the back of his head. Now the place wasn't classy or fancy, but it was unlike any place you'd ever been before. Yes, it was a trailer right off the main road in and out of town, but it was so much more. 

The small porch built onto the front of the place was covered in old license plates, random memorabilia, half working neon signs and actually had a table or two outside, but you'd never seen them used before. Opening the door to the restaurant, you were immediately greeted with an old school diner counter that had red stools to sit on. If you thought there was a lot of license plates outside, they absolutely covered the inside. It was a hodge podge of stuff and things from everywhere, a lot of it was from people passing by or who were from really far out of towners who left currency or something to add to the collection. 

"Wow..", Ray was looking all around the place, taking it all in. The place was run by a husband and wife who greeted us warmly. We somehow had gotten lucky enough to get there before the lunch rush, only one other patron was occupying a stool on the far left. The man tipped his head and hat to us, Ray went to do the same forgetting he wasn't wearing a hat, he ended up smiling and scratching the back of his head trying to cover up his fumble. 

"How y'all doin today?", the husband asked us. We gave the standard answers of 'fine', 'pretty good', 'alright, how are you?'. Taking a seat at the counter, the wife walked by us asking what we'd like to drink. 

"Coke, please," you answered and smiled.  
"Diet Coke for me," your Gran's standard drink order.  
"Uhh..yeah..I'll take a Coke too, please and thank you," Ray was so cute when he was nervous.

"Ice?"

You and your Gran both said yes at the same time, "He wants ice too," you told the lady.

"I do?"  
"Yes.." You had a silly smile on your face and he couldn't figure out why. 

The wife brought over your drinks in cans and then gave each of you ice cold mason jar glasses from the freezer that had a bit of ice inside them. 

Ray looked like you'd just given him a puzzle to do.

"See. Told you, you wanted ice.." You cracked open your can and began pouring your soda into the glass, it didn't all quite fit so you just decided to drink the remainder out of the can. You looked over and Ray had opened his can, but still wasn't doing anything. 

"It's not that hard, Ray.."  
He chuckled and leaned in a little closer to you, "I know how to pour a fucking drink, I've just never been to a place like this. It's kinda fucking awesome."

You winked at him. The husband came over and asked what we were gonna be having to eat. Ray seemed a bit flustered again, we hadn't even been given a menu. You ordered a plain cheeseburger, your Gran ordered a cheeseburger with everything on it and an order of fries for you two to share. Ray just said he would have what you were having, but with his own fries. 

"Alright, be ready shortly," the husband told his wife to get two orders of fries to us while he threw on 6 patties to the grill. She shuffled behind and past him to get to the fries, repeating the process to get back over to us. Since you were sitting the in the middle the fries were out on either side of you.

"Well I'll just eat from both of these.." You said mischievously and grabbing a fry from each of the little paper baskets. 

"Hey!" Ray feigned annoyance at your antics, making your Gran laugh. The two TVs in the place were playing the same show, but the audio was just slightly off so there was a tiny echo. You tried to ignore it and make conversation to drown it out. It didn't really work.

\------

Your burgers were given to you wrapped in cellophane paper and with a smile, telling you to enjoy. 

Ray unwrapped his, opened it to top it off with some ketchup and dug in. He seemed to like it. A lot. Seriously, the noises he was making were inappropriate for the public. You hit his knee and he seemed to jolt out of his food euphoria.

Mouth still half full he asked, "Whaa..?"

The back of your hand covered your mouth as giggled and you finished chewing, shaking your head. "You sound like you're making love to that burger and I'm pretty sure everyone in here is highly uncomfortable with that.. Except maybe the guy all the way the end, he hasn't stopped looking at you," you winked at him and he swallowed really hard. 

"You mean the guy with no teeth..?"

You chanced a look and saw the fella grinning, "yup, that's the one.."

"Well, he doesn't have any teeth so he'd probably give a good---"

You shoved his burger in his face so fast, "Shut up, shut up right now. Do not finish that sentence. Or you won't get any cookies."

You'd temporarily stopped his talking and also momentarily confused him, so hopefully those two things were enough to stall his train of thought for a bit. Your Gran started giggling and tried to cover it up by coughing then taking a drink to sooth it. 

"What?" You asked her smiling.

She pretended to act innocent, "I didn't say a thing, dear."

"Uh-huh.."

The husband came to check on us just as we were finishing off the last of the fries and mindlessly watching whatever was on the TV. 

"Y'all getting cookies today?"

"Of course! A few more than normal I suppose though, since this girl decided to bring her beau up for the weekend."

"Isthat right? Well how ya likin him so far?" He gestured to the tray piled up with fresh baked cookies to ask how many we'd like.

Your Gran held up 5 fingers and you almost questioned her, but dare not because...ya know..cookies. "He's been just fine, very helpful in the garden." 

You and Ray just sat there silent, listening and watching to them literally talk about the both of you like you weren't even there. 

"Well that's good!" He smiled widely and nudged his wife, asking her to total up our order with the extra cookies. He put each cookie in it's own sleeve and then in a paper bag, rolled the top down and placed it in front of you. 

"Yes it is! And he makes her smile like I've never seen before..," okay...she could shut up now, your cheeks were full on blushing, "and the way he looks at her, it's like she put the moon in the sky. It's amazing how magical love looks when it's new and young. I'd almost forgotten.."

You looked back at Ray to see him blushing furiously. He looked into your eyes and laughed nervously then shrugged. You turned around to your Gran and whispered something to her, turning back around, you stood up and took Ray's hand pulling him with you out the door of the restaurant. He kept asking where are we going and what's going on. You pulled him all the way back to the car and behind it even. Then you just stood there with him in front of you. 

"What the hell was that all about?", he was laughing while he asked his question.

You shook your head, smiling at him. You grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him toward you, lips crashing together. He seemed stunned at first at the public display of affection, but soon melted into it, pressing you against the back of the jeep. Before things got too intense you heard your Gran open the swinging door and call back to the owners a thanks and well wishes. At least she gave you a warning to know she was coming.

You broke apart, both breathing heavy and smiling like idiots. Walking back around laughing at yourselves, you both got into your designated seats and began fastening your seat belts. 

"So why did we get so many cookies this time?", you were trying to be casual, like you hadn't just attacked your boyfriend's face with yours in the middle of a parking lot.

"Well I figure y'all could each have one now and then one later, the extra is for your Grandpa.." She began backing up the car as she spoke to you, "but by the state of your lipstick I'd say you've had a bit of dessert before I came outside."

It was one of those moments where if you had been a cartoon your jaw would have been on the floor. You stared open mouthed and wide eyed at her smooth as silk comment. 

She was about to pull out into traffic when she turned her head and saw your face, "What? You're the one who whispered and told me you needed a minute in the parking lot alone with him. I'm not a dummy, [Y/N]. You're young. Making out in random parking lots is gonna happen." She pulled up the brown paper bag from her purse and offered it to us, "Cookie?" 

"You're wicked.."

Smiling ruefully, she laughed and pulled out on to the street, "I know.." 

So you had, apparently, been right.

That was indeed a very interesting lunch, Lord help us for what the rest of the day held.


End file.
